How to protect yourself and others

Get to know the privacy settings of online services you use. Privacy settings give you control over who interacts with you online. You can choose that only approved "friends" see your posts. You can control who contacts you online. You can make sure that you are tagged in a post or image only if you have seen it and agreed. If people behave badly, you can usually block them. It means they won’t see what you do on the app or website. It means they can’t contact you.

Keep your personal information private. Don't share your home address, passwords, phone number or other private information with people you meet online.

Remember that anything you share online could be seen by everyone you know. Someone who asks you for naked photos might later share those images with other people. If you don't want friends, family, strangers or employers to see, save intimate pictures for people you know and trust. Or, share nothing online that you wouldn't share with your mum or boss.

Don't have arguments online. Some people make mean, angry comments online. It's usually better to ignore them. If you're arguing with someone you know, it may be better do it in person instead. You're both more likely to behave well when you can see how your words affect the other person.

Be sceptical. Online connections can lead to fun, healthy friendships. However, don't believe everything. Be sceptical if someone you meet online:

• Uses a lot of flattery. For example, they might not know you very well but tell you that you are their best friend.
• Gets very personal very quickly.
• Demands to meet you in person.

It's a good idea to stop and think. Only some people online are honest about who they are and what they want. You can say no and keep talking. You can stop talking and block the person. It's up to you.

Support other people online. If you see someone else treated badly online, support them if it is safe. You don't need to get into an argument. You might say, "That sounds like harassment to me".

Use tools to stay safe. The Australian eSafety Commission has released an online safety checklist to help you improve your safety. You can access it on the eSafety Commissioner website (external link). 

To help everyone stay safer online, there are great Easy Read resources on the e-Safety Commissioner website (external link).

What to do if you’re experienced online abuse

The first thing to do is to make sure you are safe. Look after your body and your emotions. Go somewhere safe. Seek medical attention if you need it.

Then, take a deep breath. We're sorry you've had to deal with this. We hope the situation gets better. We know that experiencing violence or abuse can be confusing, intimidating, and stressful. People may try to make you believe things are your fault.

Remember that you are never to blame for bad behaviour. What happened to you is not your fault.

People with disability who talk about online harm might be scared they will lose access to devices, apps and the internet. Or, they may experience online abuse from their carer. It's hard to know what to do or who to tell.

Here is a list of things you could do if you’ve faced online abuse. You should choose the options that are right for you.‍

• ‍Call 000 if you or anyone else is in immediate danger, like if someone has threatened to hurt you. If calling 000 makes you feel nervous or unsure, you can learn more about the process on the Neve page A guide to calling triple zero (000) (internal link).

• ‍Talk to someone you trust. If you've been abused online you might feel embarrassed, ashamed or afraid. Talking can help you feel less alone. Tell the person you confide in what would and would not be helpful for you. For example, you might just want to talk. Or, you might want practical help. Let them know not to confront the person who has hurt you. It can make the abuse worse. They should focus on you and what you need to be safer and feel supported.

• Call a helpline. Australia has many helplines that offer practical advice and support for people experiencing violence or abuse. You can find a list of numbers and resources on the Neve page Helpline directory (internal link).
• Keep records of the bad behaviour. If it is safe, save private messages, photos, posts, screenshots or other evidence. If you need help doing this, ask a trusted person to help you. If you decide to report the abuse later, you will have evidence to show them.‍
• Report the experience. You can report a bad experience on the eSafety Commissioner website (external link). You can also report bad behaviour to an online service or platform, like Facebook, Reddit or Discord. They may take action. Or you could talk to your local police.‍
• Get legal help. You can use legal support to be safer, like restraining orders and protective orders. You can also get advice about whether something that happened to you is a crime. Learn about legal support options on the Neve page Accessing legal support and the courts  (internal link).

• Leave the app or social media site. It's okay to take a break or delete your account if you've had a bad experience online. Sometimes, staying online makes you feel worse.
• End an unhealthy relationship. If you are friends with the person who abused you, block them online and stop seeing them in real life if you can. If you live with the person who hurt you, learn how to safely leave a violent or abusive situation on the Neve page How to be safe when leaving an abusive relationship (internal link). If you are not ready to leave, learn how to be safer on the Neve page When you are not ready to leave a relationship (internal link).‍
• Develop more financial independence. This can help you leave when you are ready. You can learn about managing your money on the Neve page Help managing your money (internal link)‍

• Speak to a counsellor. If you have difficulties you can't manage alone, see a counsellor, therapist or psychologist. Learn about the different options on the Neve page Counselling and therapy (internal link).‍

• Know your rights. Everyone has the right to live free from violence and abuse. Learn about your rights in the Neve section Our rights (internal link).‍
• Look after yourself. Caring for yourself is important if you have experienced violence or abuse. You can learn how to be calm and more empowered on the Neve page Caring for yourself (internal link).‍
• Talk to your service coordinator. This can help if the person who harmed you provides a service related to your disability, like physiotherapy, gardening, cleaning or anything else in your NDIS plan. Tell the service coordinator what happened, and what you’d like to happen next, including if you want your complaint to remain confidential. You might want to offer feedback about the inappropriate behaviour but still work with the person. Or, you might want a new person to provide the service for you.‍
• Make a complaint to the NDIS Quality and Safeguards Commission. If the person who harmed you is an NDIS provider, you can complain to the NDIS Quality and Safeguards Commission. Learn more on the NDIS Commission website (external link).

Having a disability can make it harder to escape violence and abuse. Limited mobility or social isolation might make it harder to get help. Moving out or getting away from the person who hurts you can seem impossible when money is in short supply. However, help is available.

Even if the person who hurt you is important to you, you can still get help. Many people are hurt by someone they know. It may be an intimate partner, a parent or carer, or someone else in authority, such as a health worker or service provider. You don't have to go to the police if you don't want to. Either way, support is available to keep you safe and help you recover.

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