Trust, support, intimacy and communication

Healthy relationships need trust. Friends and partners should trust one another. They should know that they can rely on one another. They tell each other the truth.

Healthy relationships give support. Romantic partners can encourage each other's goals and dreams. Friends can do this for each other, too.

Good communication is important. In a healthy relationship, people:

• Listen.
• Ask questions to make sure they understand the other person.
• Share their thoughts and feelings.
• Solve conflict with kindness and respect.
• Talk about things that matter.

In romantic relationships, physical intimacy is important, too. Physical intimacy includes:

• Affection, like holding hands
• Touching
• Cuddles
• Sex
• Showing love and care.

All physical intimacy needs consent from both people. When people give consent to touching or sex, everyone understands what they’re doing, wants to be doing it and knows they can stop at any time if they change their mind.

‍

Healthy relationships are fair.

Both people in a relationship should have a say. If you live together, work that has to be done should be shared in a way that feels fair to both people.

One person should not do all the work but you don't have to divide every job in half, either. Disabilities can make it harder to do some types of work. Every relationship is unique. Be honest about what you need, want and can do. Talk and try new ideas until you both agree things are fair.

Time together and time for you

Spend quality time together without distractions. It helps people stay close.

Time apart is also important. It allows you to grow and find your own interests. It lets you stay in touch with other people, like family and friends. 

Conflict

Everyone disagrees sometimes. In a healthy relationship, people resolve conflicts with respect. There is no:

• Name-calling
• Violence, like hitting, slapping or scratching
• Making someone feel guilty, ashamed or scared.

Differences are easier to manage when people are willing to compromise and try new things. Listening to others is important, too. For example, one person might say:

• I don't like to be yelled at.
• I need some time to think.
• I can't talk when the music is so loud.

Statements like these are called boundaries. Boundaries explain to other people what we will and won't do, and what we like and don't like. Clear boundaries help people feel safe and comfortable in relationships.