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Self-love and you

The world often tells us we are not good enough. It's not true. Having a loving and kind relationship with ourselves sets us free to live well.

Believing in yourself is not the same as having a big ego. It doesn't mean you think you are better than others.

Loving yourself helps you:

  • Feel confident
  • Cope with hard times
  • Be yourself
  • Support people you care about.

You’re a wonderful human, worthy of love and respect. Tell yourself, "I'm amazing!" It's the truth.

Women with disabilities who have survived violence may face barriers to healing. We often have challenges, like:

  • Support services we can't access
  • People who don't understand our situation.

You will find it easier to love yourself when you recognise the challenges you face. Be kind to yourself. Others struggle, too. You can learn more about what you share with others - and how you are unique - in the Neve section Our community (internal link).

Why you should love yourself

Often, we feel good when we do well. It could be:

  • Big achievements, like winning an award or getting a degree
  • Social approval, like having lots of friends on social media
  • The opinions of others, like when someone tells you that you did a good job.

These things feel good but you should love yourself just because you are you.

Celebrate your skills, talents, opinions, and experiences but remember you don't have to be perfect to be worthy of love and happiness. You deserve these things simply because you're you. You're amazing, just as you are!

Why you should be kind to yourself

No one is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone faces challenges.

When times are tough, treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would give a friend.

Tell yourself:

  • "I'm only human."
  • "Everyone makes mistakes."
  • "I can learn from that."

Don't talk to yourself in a mean way. Encourage yourself instead.

Notice when you put yourself down

Many of us talk to ourselves in ways that we would never talk to friends. We think things like:

  • "I'm an idiot."
  • "Of course I messed that up."
  • "No one wants me there."

These thoughts make us feel less confident and less loved.

Say kind things to yourself instead. If you think, "I'm not good enough," say, "I am worthy and capable."  

Say no and set healthy boundaries

Learn to say no when necessary. When we set boundaries, we tell people what we won't do or won't accept from others. Setting boundaries shows that we respect ourselves. It shows that our needs and limits matter. When you set a boundary, you give yourself the chance to feel good and do well in life.

 

Have healthy relationships

Surround yourself with people who support and inspire you. Healthy relationships make you feel you belong. They help you remember that you matter. In contrast, unhealthy relationships make you less confident.

Think about your social circle. Does it make you feel:

  • Loved?
  • Appreciated?
  • Seen?

Spend time with friends, family and supporters who help you grow and feel good about yourself.

 

Celebrate achievements, big and small

Celebrate your achievements, regardless of their size. Recognise efforts like when you:

  • Finish a project.
  • Meet a goal.
  • Get through a tough day.
  • Try something new.

You'll feel proud and grateful.

 

Grow as a person

Keep learning. Keep working on yourself. Set and achieve personal goals. It could be about your career, hobbies, or relationships.

Getting things done helps you feel proud. It gives life meaning. You develop skills and learn more about yourself. It helps you feel confident.

 

Make yourself feel good

Look after your mind and body. Do things that make you feel good. It brings:

  • Joy
  • Relaxation
  • A feeling that you can meet life's challenges.

When you care for yourself, you teach yourself that you're worthy of care. It's an important message.

 

Seek professional help

If you face challenges you can't manage on your own, therapists and counsellors can help. They can give you tools to improve your relationship with yourself. For example, if you often put yourself down, they can help you understand why. They can help you change, so that you treat yourself kindly.

 

Remind yourself that you don't have to be perfect

No one is perfect. Embrace the things you don't like about yourself. They are part of who you are. We all fail sometimes. We all make mistakes. When we face challenges, we can grow and learn. There is beauty in being imperfect.

1800 RESPECT

If you experience violence or abuse you can contact 1800 RESPECT for support and counselling.
Call 1800 737 732 or go to the 1800 RESPECT website to chat with someone online (external link).

‍To contact 1800RESPECT via SMS, text ‘HELLO’ or any greeting to 0458 737 732 to start the conversation.

Becoming stronger after hard experiences

It's normal to need support and care after experiencing violence or abuse. Support can help you heal and live a full and joyful life. Many people need time to regain confidence and independence after hard times. Taking extra special care of yourself can help. This section of Neve deals with recovery. It covers things like gaining financial independence and building self-confidence. We share self-care tips and advice about reconnecting to your community. We hope it will help you on your healing journey.

Find out more

Understanding body image and self-confidence

Body image is how you see your body and your thoughts and feelings about it. This page describes some of the ways people in our community struggle with body image. We talk about disabled bodies, eating disorders and other things that affect how we see ourselves. We share strategies for growing to love and accept your body.

Find out more

Resources.

May 4, 2024

|

Headspace

Body scan meditation to reduce stress

Here’s everything you need to know about body scan meditation — including how to do it.

Check resource

May 4, 2024

|

Participate Australia

Making Money Easy

A tool to support children, teens and adults with mild to moderate intellectual disability to learn basic counting and money handling skills.

Check resource

May 4, 2024

|

Disability Australia Hub

Self-advocacy

Self-advocacy is when someone with disability speaks up and represents themselves. This guide shows you how.

Check resource

May 7, 2024

|

Touching Base

Booklets For People With Disability

Resources and information for people with disability about seeing a sex worker.

Check resource

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Learning to love yourself

The most important relationship you have is with yourself. It's true! Learning to love yourself and treat yourself with care and respect is the most important thing you will ever do. Here, we share ways to recognise your worth. We give tips for being kind to yourself. We celebrate you.

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